“It Doesn’t Always Start off Easy”

“It Doesn’t Always Start off Easy”



“Hey Joe…..I want to first start off by apologizing to you for my rude behavior yesterday. I wasn’t having a good day, but that was no excuse for me acting like a putz, so I apologize for that. You’re a nice guy and I know you were trying to keep the mood light yesterday.”


Sometimes you just have to work through the stuff before you can get to the other side. Most of the time it has nothing to do with you, but you can’t lose focus on the responsibility to be professional even when there is tension between people that you are working with.


I thought it took a lot of guts for this client (a cop) to acknowledge that he was a putz and clear things up.


How would you have handled it?


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Joe Petrowsky, NMLS #6869

Right Trac Financial Group, Inc. NMLS #2709

110 Main St.

Manchester, Ct. 06042

Office: 860 647-7701 x116

Fax: 860 647-8940

Cell: 860 836-9294

Email: joe@righttracfg.com



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Joe Petrowsky does not guarantee nor is in any way responsible for the accuracy of the information provided herein, and provides said information without warranties of any kind, either expressed or implied.

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Comment balloon 28 commentsJoe Petrowsky • September 18 2015 11:45AM


Good morning, Joe Petrowsky  it's very difficult to stay composed and not mirror the other person, when rudeness and nastiness comes your way.... I often have a problem doing that!!!

Posted by Barbara Todaro, Marketing Agent for The Todaro Team (RE/MAX Executive Realty ) about 4 years ago

Good for you maintaining your professionalism.  It takes a lot for someone to apologize like that.

Posted by Debbie Gartner, The Flooring Girl & Blog Stylist -Dynamo Marketers (The Flooring Girl) about 4 years ago

Good morning Joe.  Having been in that profession I can just imagine the things he said.  Another example of letting the moment cloud your thoughts but being unable to keep the mouth shut.

Posted by James Dray, Exceptional Agents, Outstanding Results (Fathom Realty) about 4 years ago

Hi Joe.  As I have gotten older it usually slides off.  This year has been tougher to do that.

Posted by Conrad Allen, Webster, Ma, Realtor (Re/Max Professional Associates) about 4 years ago

Yes, Joe, nice that he owned up to his bad behavior. Not many people do.

Posted by Gabe Sanders, Stuart Florida Real Estate (Real Estate of Florida specializing in Martin County Residential Homes, Condos and Land Sales) about 4 years ago

Everyone has "off" days..it takes a big person to admit it....and a bigger one to apologize.

Posted by Sally K. & David L. Hanson, WI Realtors - Luxury - Divorce (EXP Realty 414-525-0563) about 4 years ago

Joe - I think the biggest problem is learning to listen and not respond in kind.  It can be hard sometimes.

Posted by Grant Schneider, Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes (Performance Development Strategies) about 4 years ago

Good Morning Joe,

It does take a lot from a person to make an apology.

It also takes a lot from someone to make you really furious and lose composure.

Posted by Maria Gilda Racelis, Home Ownership is w/in Reach. We Make it Happen! (Home Buyers Realty, LLC-Manchester, Bolton. Vernon,Ellington) about 4 years ago

I had a very similar experience recently.  Fortunately, I knew the stresses the client was under outside of our transaction and attempted to help him see the big picture.  A few days later my phone "blew up" with lengthy text messages of apology...  I've found in most ofthese situtions that "less is more"... Let them talk.  That's often all they nee.   Keep Calm & Carry On! 

Posted by Brenda Mayette, Getting results w/ knowledge & know-how! (Miranda Real Estate Group, Inc.) about 4 years ago

Good morning Joe. I think you handled it just right because the client knew and apologized.

Posted by Sheila Anderson, The Real Estate Whisperer Who Listens 732-715-1133 (Referral Group Incorporated) about 4 years ago

Usually I stop the conversation and suggest we talk tomorrow...rarely happens but some people just have short fuses.

Posted by Ginny Gorman, Homes for Sale in North Kingstown RI and beyond (RI Real Estate Services ~ 401-529-7849~ RI Waterfront Real Estate) about 4 years ago

Good morning Joe,

As a cop is human and see's more problems than we do it is amazing they keep as cool as they do sometimes. A tough situation but at least he apologized.

Make yourself a great day.

Posted by Raymond E. Camp, Licensed Real Estate Salesperson Greater Rochester (Howard Hanna Real Estate Services) about 4 years ago

You have to remain calm and in control even though the other person isn't. Not always an easy task!

Posted by Evelyn Johnston, The People You Know, Like and Trust! (Friends & Neighbors Real Estate) about 4 years ago

At least they realized their position, and good that they owned up to it...most would not!

Posted by Lawrence "Larry" & Sheila Agranoff. Cell: 631-805-4400, Long Island Home and Condo Specialists (The Top Team @ Charles Rutenberg Realty 255 Executive Dr, Plainview NY 11803) about 4 years ago

It was nice of this person to say he was sorry. I had a recent transaction where the client was very rude .

Posted by Gita Bantwal, REALTOR,ABR,CRS,SRES,GRI - Bucks County & Philadel (RE/MAX Centre Realtors) about 4 years ago

Most us us do not frequently see this kind of message. This person deserves a lot of credit.

Posted by Roy Kelley (Realty Group Referrals) about 4 years ago

I have people in my life recently who have become crabby. It's important for us to know that it's not personal, that it's their problem. But I still don't like it and they need to know that. Apologizing goes a long way to keep the relationship going. But it still doesn't make it ok.

Posted by Hella M. Rothwell, Broker/Realtor®, Rothwell Realty Inc. CA#01968433 Carmel-by-the-Sea about 4 years ago

Joe, it is nice someone actually apologized for their behavior.  I had a client years ago that acted like a putz too, and admited it at closing.

Posted by Joan Cox, Denver Real Estate - Selling One Home at a Time (House to Home, Inc. - Denver Real Estate - 720-231-6373) about 4 years ago

I think that does take guts and as you said we know that most of us have much more going on and it trickles over into other situations. Hope it will be smooth siling from here on out.

Posted by Debbie Reynolds, Your Dedicated Clarksville TN Real Estate Agent (Platinum Properties) about 4 years ago

Joe: It takes patience to not lash out when someone is giving you the biz. Kudos to you for keeping your composure.

Posted by Anita Clark, Realtor - Homes for Sale in Warner Robins GA (ColdwellBanker SSK Realtors ~ 478.960.8055) about 4 years ago

Taking responsibility and apologizing when an apology is due takes courage - it's a measure of a person. I'm glad he did, and I'm sure you accepted it graciously. I suspect this relationship will be smooth sailing going forward.

Posted by Lottie Kendall, Helping make your real estate dreams a reality (Compass) about 4 years ago

Joe Petrowsky  I would except his apology and let him know we all  have bad days -BUT  I thought we had such a good relationship -That is why I am glad he apologized

Posted by Hannah Williams, Expertise NE Philadelphia & Bucks 215-953-8818 (Re/Max Eastern inc.) about 4 years ago

Joe Petrowsky You are a better man for accepting his apology. Too many of us don't forgive and forget.

Bill Roberts

BTW I know a few Yiddish words. Including this one.

Posted by Bill Roberts, "Baby Boomer" Retirement Planner (Brooks and Dunphy Real Estate) about 4 years ago


We all have those moments, and it is always nice to apoligize...Saving face is what the Japanese are famous for, and there is a lot of wisdom in that attitude.  A

Posted by Ron and Alexandra Seigel, Luxury Real Estate Branding, Marketing & Strategy (Napa Consultants) about 4 years ago

Joe-Yes, it takes something to admit acting like a putz and offering an apology. Considering what cops and military people go through, I'd cut them more slack than I would  the average citizen.

Posted by Wayne Johnson, San Antonio REALTOR, San Antonio Homes For Sale (Coldwell Banker D'Ann Harper REALTORS®) about 4 years ago

Joe I would tell him thank you for the apology, and that I look forward to working with him, and not spend any more time on the tone of the prior conversation.

Posted by George Souto, Your Connecticut Mortgage Expert (George Souto NMLS #65149 FHA, CHFA, VA Mortgages) about 4 years ago

That is an noble thing for him to do! He is right about one thing... most of the time it is not personal! Way to hang in there!

Posted by The Julie Morales Team, Real Estate Questions? Call (832) 367-3412 (RE/MAX Cinco Ranch) about 4 years ago


What started off on the wrong foot . . . . is in a full scale correction . . . . and now is moving in the right direction.

Good luck and success.

Lou Ludwig

Posted by Lou Ludwig, Designations Earned CRB, CRS, CIPS, GRI, SRES, TRC (Ludwig & Associates) about 4 years ago